It is common in many Black households to hear the phrase, “You have to work twice as hard to get half as far.” These often quoted words always left a bitter taste in my mouth. It was a sentiment that I could not embody within my own life, for I know I have not and could not always be great. I’ve had moments where I’ve reached my limit, and couldn’t continue further. The greatest example of this being my recent break from the highly esteemed master’s program. I had graduated in three years with my bachelor’s degree, but still I was often pushed to stay in school. It seemed a good idea at the time, but little did I know the obstacles that would soon engulf the lowering passion for learning that I possessed. For various reasons, I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t work “twice as hard,” and it left me feeling like a shell of myself.
I was finished and I knew it. After one semester and two failing grades, I decided to take a break.
I decided to be less than twice as good.
But the reason that quote never felt right for me to adopt as my own is not because of my academic failings. I have a problem with the saying because it sets up for our lives to become an impossible race that we will always, in some form or fashion, lose. It states that White people will always be superior, and our jobs as Black people are to join in on this scam.
Perfectionism in the Black Community
When we think of running a race, we often think of athletes, so in this example I use Olympic champion Gabby Douglas. She wasn’t just half as good, she was better than many of her peers. So much so, that she eventually would become the first African-American woman to win the All-Around Gold in her sport of gymnastics. Certainly, she worked more than twice as hard, and her results showed for it.
However, national headlines were made not just for her history-making win, but for her hair.
“Why isn’t her hair done?” “It looks nappy,” “you can’t bring Black people nowhere,” were some of the comments I had seen.
These lines of attacks were not made from White people, but from those within our own community.
They highlight the impossibly difficult standards to attain, which is utter perfectionism within and amongst Black people.
Yes, she won the gold medal and represented her country in front of millions of people, but it wasn’t enough for many since her hair wasn’t laid.
This is just one clear example of the deep rooted desire to become an embodiment of perfection rather than well-functioning human beings in society.
Gabby had done her job and won, but for some, it still was not enough.
When will our efforts ever be enough?
Allowing Space for Failure
While most everyday citizens aren’t vying for a global gold medal, most of us have small or big goals ahead of us. Things that we dream of accomplishing in this world. If I were to change that quote, I would instead change it to convey that we are only in competition with ourselves. If the best we can manage at one point in time is a C, then it should be known that C’s still get degrees. If Gabby had won silver instead of the Gold, surely she would still be worthy of praise. The point of this article is not to condone failure when we know we can do better, but rather to redefine what it means to be great in the Black community.
Why do we uphold such huge pressures upon ourselves when we know that the odds are unfairly stacked against us? We preach Black excellence for such extraordinary feats, which are well deserved, but I believe just our mere existence is a feat in and of itself.
Working our way our of poverty, out of the lower class, and building a decent life is never seen as enough. We have to continually strive for and push for the overall betterment of our race. These severe pressures to be “twice as good,” undermine our struggles and undermine the fact that we are human before we are Black. This isn’t meant to erase our culture, but rather to allow for mediocrity in a space where excellence has become an unrealistic standard. We need to humanize ourselves instead of relegating our entire race to the doomed pattern of accepting crumbs.
I believe if there’s an inherent desire to be the best then so be it, but we should also acknowledge that some people are not going to be able to work twice as hard just to earn that half. Some of us are content with the average. Whether that be working a 9-5, only graduating high school, or working a trade. There’s a gift and a lane for all of us to reach success in our own ways without having to beat ourselves up for tiny missteps we make in life.
Redefining Greatness
Why don’t we allow ourselves to have weaknesses in one area and strengths in another? Why can’t we not be great, and do our natural failings lead us to the idea that those who can’t surpass unimaginable struggles to reach the “top,” deserve less? Why, when it seems we’re only fighting for a half?
We act sometimes defensively, assuming that white people will think less of us if we don’t work tirelessly, but constantly proving our worth does nothing in the end. It seems we aren’t allowed to be human. We aren’t allowed to fail because we look at our accomplishments as proof that we’ve lived a “good life,” rather than honoring ourselves.
Author Guilaine Kinouani states, “Society tells us that to deserve to live, we must have some rare and incredible talent. In art, in sport, in science. In any field, if we are exceptional enough, then people might forgive and forget our Blackness. We might transcend our race, they say.”
They also say that comparison is the thief of joy and yet, we find ourselves in constant competition between family, within our race, and even outside of it as we chase for more accolades and more letters behind our name. We’ll never be satisfied if we live our lives that way.
We can’t erase our skin color, nor the fact that society might always paint us as racist stereotypes, but we can give ourselves the power of individuality. Finding our own unique goals, whether it be big or small, but fuck it! Why do we always have to chase a goal? At what point do we reach contentment for where we are as a culture and as a people?
I think Greatness will be the day we ease the pressures of these sometimes unrealistic standards and allow ourselves to create our own definition.
Redefine what greatness means to us. Great can be waking up in the morning. Great can be going to bed at night. Great can be overcoming depression. Great can be failing just one test.
We must acknowledge that success is not our savior, and cannot heal us from decades of abuse, trauma, and neglect within our culture. We have to allow room for black mediocrity, and we have to allow room for eventual growth in order to be great as a whole.
